Self-doubt serves no positive purpose.
Why is it there? Maybe it’s some inbuilt mechanism designed to protect us. Since studying the model of the mind and training in the Control System with Tim Box,
I’ve learnt that we have all these patterns of thought that are very much set from a young age. I guess that self-doubt is a common one across the board and it’s something that I’ve always struggled with.
I’ve also learnt that our subconscious only ever wants whats best for us; the only flaw with that is sometimes what our subconscious thinks is best for us is, in fact, the opposite.
The Control System accesses the subconscious and changes the pattern of thought. Through this amazing experience of learning to become a practitioner and completing multiple case studies, which has allowed me to see the evidence of how this system works, I’ve been using it on myself to make changes in my life and the best most incredible session on myself happened during the Chester marathon last weekend.
I had booked the Chester Marathon back in the summer after employing the phenomenal Liz Weeks as my running coach.
My running and general fitness was not where I wanted it to be. I knew I was doing ok but there was something inside me that knew I was capable of more and that I would be a whole lot happier if I made a few changes.
The changes were personal to me and we all find fulfilment in different ways. For me, self-discipline and feeling super fit really do it for me! So the training regime began, along with a huge calorie slash as after downloading MyFitnessPal I realised I had been consuming way too many calories! And actually there is another blog here waiting to be written on how the less I consumed, the better I felt… Training with Liz was so hard at the start and sometimes I would wait for her to turn up to our session hoping to be struck down by lightning so I didn’t have to do it! But I knew it was all a process and one day the feeling would change. And it did change! 4 months down the line, I’m faster, fitter, still pushing myself to the absolute max and each session is still hugely intense, but the difference is that I feel fitter and completely different. It’s kind of hard to explain but the feeling you’re getting changes.
The day of Chester marathon arrived! I had spent the day before, lunching and perusing the streets of the beautiful Chester with my lovely best friend who lives there; and although it was a lovely day and we were having lots of fun, in the back of my mind the marathon was looming.
I woke up in my Premier Inn on the day of the marathon and kind of went onto autopilot, getting ready for the race and making my way to Chester Racecourse where the event was to start. The thoughts going through my head were mixed. On the one hand, I knew I had been training hard. The only thing I hadn’t done was any long runs in the lead up to it (which isn’t advisable!) but I had been training lots and certainly felt fit. But I also had the self-doubt.
The part of my subconscious that wanted to protect me. My conscious, the logical part that had signed me up to this knowing that it would be an incredible experience, had brought me to the start line but my subconscious was telling me a different story.. ‘You’re not up to this’, ‘You’re too tired, you’ll never make it’, were just some of the internal dialogue.
As I approached the start line, I knew I had to make a change. I began to use the Control System to talk to my subconscious and reassign the part that was keeping me in this negative thought pattern to something more helpful. For the first 10 miles of the race, I felt incredible! I was smiling, I felt happy and my internal dialogue had changed to ‘I can’t believe how easy this is!’ I felt pure positive energy and I knew I could do it! Now this wonderful ‘It’s so easy!’ feeling didn’t last much after about mile 11 when the pain kicked in and it started to get really real.
Oh yes, marathons aren’t easy at all!
I knew now that I’d have to dig in and stay strong for a long time but I also wanted to enjoy the experience. I continued to practice the Control System on myself and it became a kind of spiritual experience.
The more I tapped into the subconscious and re-educated it on what would really help me, the better I felt! I’m not going to lie, I was in pain! But it was an enjoyable pain. I had managed to change the whole experience from negative to positive. It was absolutely, hands down, the best race of my life!
Even at mile 20 when the fatigue hit my legs, I kept upbeat, my subconscious was understanding what I required to get me around the course. I want to say that it’s unbelievable how easily a change can be made when you know how but it really isn’t unbelievable at all because I lived the experience1
This year has been groundbreaking for me in so many ways. Through deciding to make just a few positive changes, my joy in life has expanded in so many unexpected ways. I’m so grateful to have found Liz Weeks and been able to improve my fitness so enormously and I’m so grateful to have been lucky enough to discover Tim Box and the remarkable Control System. Through this method, I’ve been able to completely redirect my pattern of thought to work in my favour. There really are no limits to what we are able to achieve.